Burger jokes

What do you use to determine if a refrigerated burger is cold enough? A thermomeater!

When do hamburgers most enjoy watching TV? During PRIME time!

Which people do the burgers hate? The ones who are always putting the bite on them!

Why do hamburgers feel sad at barbecues? They get to meet their old flames!

What famous movie did the hamburger meat think of when they took it out of the freezer? They Fry Who Cam in from the Cold!

When does a hamburger wear a look like a smile button? When somebody says, 'Well done'!

Which political discussions between the Russians and Americans keenly interest Burger Land citizens? The SALT talks!

Why do hamburgers make good baseball players? They're great at the plate!

What great song is associated with hamburgers and baseball? 'Steak Me Out to the Ballgame'!

When the crooked hamburger took it on the 'lamb', where did it go? Oh, 'ewe'know!

Which type of comedy leaves a hamburger cold? BITING humour!

Why do hamburgers make poor pigeons? They won't talk no matter how you grill them!

What happens when two burgers fall in love? They live together in holy meatrimony!

Where can a burger get a great night's sleep? On a bed of lettuce!

Who are the hamburgers favourite people? Vegetarians!

Why do the hamburgers beat the hot dogs at every sport they play? Because hot dogs are the wurst!

What is a hamburger's favourite story? Hansel and Gristle!

Where do the burgers go on New Year's Eve? To a meat ball!

Who can beat any burger at golf? Any LINKS sausage!

Why is President Carter important to Hamburger Land in April? One the opening day of the baseball season, he throws out the first meatball!

What is the hamburgers'most familiar song? 'Home on the Range'!

Where does a burger feel at home? On the range!

Who do hamburgers love on TV? Archie Bunker's son- in- law, the meathead!

Why was the burger thrown out of the Army? He couldn't pass mustard! (muster)

What is the hamburgers'motto? If at first you don't succeed, fry, fry again!

Where does a burger go on vacation? The Swiss (cheese) Alps or The Cheeseapeake Valley!

Who is the hamburgers'favourite actress? Candice Berger!

Why were the burgers in the refrigerator embarrassed? They saw the salad dressing!

What kind of a pitch did Sandy Koufax of the old Burger- lyn Dodgers have? A fastball – a sizzler.

Which baseball team is currently the favourite with hamburger fans? The Cincinnati Reds – because they're the Big Bread Machine!

Who was the burger's favourite all- time movie director? Sizzle B. DeMille!

What kind of baseball do burgers play? Ketchup baseball!

Which burgers are dishonest? Cat- burgers! (burglars)

Who wins most of the medals for bravery in Burger Land? The meatball heros!

What did they tell the burger who enlisted in the Army? You've got no beef, soldier!