Is there a mouse in the house? No, but there's a moose on the loose!
Why did the mouse eat a candle? For some light refreshment!
When should a mouse carry an umbrella? When it's raining cats and dogs!
What goes dot, dot, dash, squeak? Mouse code!
What are crisp, like milk and go 'eek, eek, eek'when you eat them? Mice Krispies!
What do you get if cross a mouse woth a packet of washing up powder? Bubble and squeak!
What is small, furry and brilliant at sword fights? A mouseketeer!
What's a mouse's favourite record? Please cheese me!
What do you get if you try to cross a mouse with a skunk? Dirty looks from the mouse!
Do you know what a mice said when it saw a bat? Mom! I see an angel.
Who has large antlers, a high voice and wears white gloves? Mickey Moose!
What's the definition of a narrow squeak? A thin mouse!
How do you save a drowning mouse? Use mouse to mouse resuscitation!
What goes eek, eek, bang? A mouse in a minefield!
Where do hamsters come from? Hamsterdam!
What's gray, squeaky and hangs around in caves? Stalagmice!
What's a mouse's least favorite record? What's up Pussycat!
What mouse was a Roman emperor? Julius Cheeser!
Why do mice need oiling? Because they squeak!
Who is king of all the mice? Mouse Tse Tung!
What do rodents say when they play bingo? 'Eyes down for a full mouse'!
What do angry rodents send each other at Christmas time? Cross mouse cards!
What squeaks as it solves crimes? Miami mice!
What's the hardest part of milking a mouse? Getting it to fit over a bucket!
What did Tom get when he locked Jerry in the freezer? Mice cubes!
Hickory hickory dock. The mouse ran up the clock The clock struck one But the rest got away with minor injuries
What is a mouse's favorite record? 'Please cheese me'!
What's gray and furry on the inside and white on the outside? A mouse sandwich!
What have 12 legs, six eyes, three tails and can't see? Three blind mice!
How do mice celebrate when they move home? With a mouse warming party!
What is small, furry and smells like bacon? A hamster!
What is a mouse's favourite game? Hide and squeak!
One lab mouse to another: I've trained that crazy human at last. How have you done that? I don't know how, but every time I run through that maze and ring the bell, he gives me a piece of cheese.
What do mice do when they're at home? Mousework!
What does a twelve- pound mouse say to a cat? 'Here Kitty, kitty, kitty'!