Still in the family
You might be a redneck if you've been married three timesand still have the same in- laws.
Redneck Jokes
You might be a redneck if…jeans
You prefer to walk the excess length off your jeans rather then hem them.
Redneck centerpeice
You might be a redneck if the centerpiece on your dining room table is an original signed work by a famous taxidermist.
You might be a redneck if…car race
You go to a stock car race and don't need a program.
House explosion
You might be a redneck if you lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off it's wheels.
You might be a redneck if…ID
Someone asks to see your I. D. and you show them your belt buckle.
Star bangled banner
You might be a redneck if you think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are " Gentlemen, start your engines. "
You might be a redneck if…prom
Your junior- senior prom had a day- care center.
You might be a redneck if… rich relative
Your richest relative buys a new house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.
You might be a redneck if…cars
Less than half the cars you own run.
You might be a redneck if… in bed
You've ever used lard in bed.
You might be a redneck if…sideburns
You grow your sideburns longer and fuller because it looks so good on your sister.
You might be a redneck if… meat
You think potted meat on a saltine is an hors d'oeuvre.
You might be a redneck if…mama
Your mother does not remove the marlboro from her lips before telling the state patrolman to kiss her ass.
You might be a redneck if… shirts
You own more then three shirts with the sleeves cut off.
You might be a redneck if…car color
The primary color of your car is " Bond- Q. "
You might be a redneck if… girlfriend
You've ever spray painted your girlfriend's name on an overpass.
You might be a redneck if…deer head
Your mounted deer head sports a baseball cap and sunglasses.
You might be a redneck if… bowling
You've ever been blacklisted from a bowling alley.
You might be a redneck if… highschool
Your high school annual is now a mug shot book for the police department.
You might be a redneck if… reunion
The highlight of your family reunion was your sister's nude dancing debut.
You might be a redneck if… christman
You've ever done your Christmas shopping at a truck stop.
Star spangled banner
you might be a red neck if you think the last words to the star spangled banner is " gentlemen start your engines"
You might be a redneck if… possum
There is a stuffed 'possum mounted anywhere in your home.
Redneck's last words
What are the last words that a redneck usually says before he dies? " Hey ya'll. Watch this! "
You might be a redneck if…beer
You consider a six pack of beer and a bug- zapper quality entertainment.
Redneck house
You might be a redneck if your house still has the " WIDE LOAD" sign still on it.
You might be a redneck if…goal
Your lifetime goal is to own your own fireworks stand.