Teeth jokes

What comes out at night and goes Munch, munch, ouch! A vampire with a rotten tooth.

Willie: " I have an awful toothache. " Tommie: " I'd have it taken out if it was mine. " Willie: " Yes, if it was yours, I would, too. "

What's the difference between a vampire with toothache and a rainstorm? One roars with pain and the other pours with rain.

What game do you play if you don't take care of your teeth? Tooth (truth) or Consequences.

What do you get it you cross a porcupine with a giraffe? A long necked toothbrush.

What helps keep your teeth together? Toothpaste.

What did the mouse say when his friend broke his front teeth? Hard cheese.

Why are false teeth like stars? Because they come out at night.

What happened when a man fell in love with a grand piano? He said, " Darling, you've got lovely teeth. "

What do you get if you cross teeth with candy? Dental floss!

Why is 4, 840 square yards like a bad tooth? Because it is an acre.

What happened when the slave put his head into a lions mouth to count how many teeth he had? The lion closed its mouth to see how many heads the slave had!

What has teeth but no mouth? A comb or a saw.

What did one tooth say to the other tooth? " Thar's gold in them thar fills. "

What did the tooth say to the dentist? " Fill 'er up! "

How does Snoop Dogg keep his canine teeth white? BLEEEEEE- YATCH!

Beatrice Lillie (Lady Peel) was once accosted by a haughty old dowager who scrutinized her through her lorgnettes. " What lovely pearls, dear Beatrice, " she maliciously remarked. " Are they real? " Yes, nodded Lady Peel. " Of course, " the dowager declared, " you can always tell real pearls by biting them. May I try? " " Gladly, " Lady Peel replied. " But remember, Duchess, you can't tell real pearls with false teeth. "

Mother: Has your tooth stopped hurting yet?…Son: I don't know. The dentist kept it

Patient: Tell me honestly, how am I? Dentist: Your teeth are fine, but your gums will have to come out.

Why are vampires like false teeth? They all come out at night.

What sort of an act do you do? I bend over backwards and pick up a handkerchief with my teeth. Anything else? Then I bend over backwards and pick up my teeth.

Why is a toothless dog like a tree? It has more bark than bite.

" Your teeth are like the stars, " he said, As he pressed her hand, so white. He spoke the truth, for, like the stars, Her teeth came out at night!

How can you get a set of teeth put in for free? Smack a monster.

Why did the termite eat a sofa and two chairs? It had a suite tooth.

Why didn't the monster use toothpaste? Because he said his teeth weren't loose.

What did the Abominable Snowman do after he had had his teeth pulled out? He ate the dentist.

What did one tooth say to the other? Get your cap on, the dentist is taking us out tonight.

Why does a vampire clean his teeth three times a day? To prevent bat breath.

Why do you forget a tooth, as soon as the dentist pulls it out? Because it goes right out of your head.

What's the best thing to put into a pizza? Your teeth.

Fan: I've always admired you. Are your teeth your own? Actor: Whose do you think they are?

What did the vampire call his false teeth? A new fangled device.

What happened to the man who put his false teeth in backwards? He ate himself!

Why did the old lady cover her mouth with her hands when she sneezed? To catch her false teeth.